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I am so grateful to have learned about bonding patterns because the awareness of them not only helps enormously in my relationship, but they also act as a guide for which parts of myself I have lost connection to.

Because bonding patterns are the natural way that we give and receive love, they are unavoidable.

But inevitably, they become stifled by strong relationship patterns that form where people get stuck relating to one another from one main part of themselves that bonds with its opposite in the other person.

These are called “bonding patterns.” So, for example, a very responsible man might become a “responsible father” in relation to his partner's inner “pleasing daughter,” and a nurturing woman might become a “nurturing mother” to her partner's inner “needy son.” If the woman doesn’t become conscious of her own responsibility, she will rely on her partner to be responsible.

This can disappoint some people close to you, such as your family.

But if you want to find fulfillment in your life, you have to fulfill yourself, not someone else!

So just be yourself, whether that means you dress in corporate attire or resort wear, or casual clothing or more formal, or if your preference changes at different times.

You don’t need to be a particular weight or have large biceps or wear uncomfortable shoes if you don’t like them.

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And the way we do that is by developing characteristics that meet our survival needs and pushing away any characteristics that aren’t valued or needed.

When I started to discover more about myself and to follow my own path, I started to live a life that was meaningful to .

I was no longer following someone else's rules and ideas about what I should do.

I stopped looking for “the one” after a two-year relationship ended, which I had believed was the one.

I decided to turn my attention inward—to get to know and accept myself, to heal past wounds, and to explore and develop new parts of myself.

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